


The way of the fist

by PrettyTurtle



Category: Ragnarok Online
Genre: Blood, F/M, Sexual Content, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-11-18
Updated: 2012-11-18
Packaged: 2017-11-18 23:58:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/566754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrettyTurtle/pseuds/PrettyTurtle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raised since she was 5 to become a priest, Verica's life is shaken when she meets Kenneth, a champion who shows her the existence of monks. She seizes the occasion and follows Kenneth to become a holy executioner. But their meeting was everything but a coincidence...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A new path

**Author's Note:**

> You may have seen this fics on fiction.net under the same name, posted by RoxanneN. That is indeed me. I didn't stole it or anything :P I just felt like posting it somewhere else. I hope I'll reach other ragnarok online's fans :) It is the first fic I've ever write, please be indulgent :P

Context:

This story takes place in the future of the Ragnarok online we know. Rune Midgard and the region surrounding it were converted long ago to Christianity. The Sanctuary of Rachel no longer serves the goddess Freya, but the catholic God and so does the pope. Odin’s shrine was sealed long ago and no one is allowed to enter it. People were forced to abandon their old gods, but some of them still worship Odin in the privacy of their home, away from the spying eyes of the clergy. Many young people don’t even remember that there was once other gods. It’s in this religious context that this story unfolds. Please keep this in mind and enjoy it.

\---

'23 birds on the rope over there' Verica thought to herself while looking by the window. 'This cloud looks like a banana and this one looks like a piece of bread. Hm, I must be really hungry to see food everywhere like this…'

"Verica! Are you listening to me?"

Verica snapped out of her reveries. "O-of course m'am!"

Kebbaku looked at her with disapproval. "No, you are not! You were looking at God knows what outside the window" then she closed the curtains and smacked Verica behind her head. "You do realize your priest exam is in 4 days young girl? Do you consider yourself ready for it?"

Verica sighed and looked at her teacher with bubbly eyes "I'm sorry m'am, but this is such a wonderful and sunny day. I can't help but feel that I'm missing something trapped in this gray church when I could be outside enjoying this beautiful day God is giving us."

"You're lying again. You don't care about the weather. You're just bored with my lesson, and you're trying to find something else to entertain yourself. And you're probably thinking about food since I can hear your belly grumbling."

Verica gave her an awkward smile "haha, you know me so well Kebbaku. I'm truly sorry. It's just that we've been through this lesson millions of time. I think I know pretty well how to heal. It's like a basic skill for acolytes!"

"You'll have to use it a lot during your test. I just want to make sure you're ready for it. You're only 16 but you know I have-"

"High hopes for me, yes, I know…" Verica said while looking at the curtains.

Kebbaku looked at Verica’s dark eyes with compassion. "Alright miss. I guess I've filled your brain with enough information for today. And for God's sake, please find something to eat before the whole church hears the sounds of your stomach!"

"Yes m'am!"

Verica left the class and went outside the church to buy something to eat. 'Kebbaku really is a nice teacher. And she cares so much about me. Maybe too much' she though. She arrived at the market and bought some bread. She ate it while going back to the church. On her way, a young swordsman bumped into her and she fell on her rear.

"Hey, watch where you're going!" she said obviously angry while getting up.

"Oh, I'm sorry young lady. Here let me help you"

"It's okay, I can stand by myself!"

"Now now, don't make such a face, you'll get wrinkles. You don't want wrinkles now do you? Such a beautiful face, it would be a shame. "

"...Are you flirting with me"

"Maybe! Wanna come have a drink some place?"

Verica looked at him in disbelief. Was he blind? She's wearing an acolyte suit. Surely he knows acolytes are not allowed such relationship. Well, maybe he's just dumb.

"I'm an acolyte; I'm not allowed to have a boyfriend or…anything like that"

"Oh, that's fine by me! We can just skip that part and go to the interesting one!" he said with a grin.

"…WHAT!" she yelled, shocked. He moved toward her and she quickly punched him right in the face.

"Ooww! AAHH! THE FUCK!"

"You stay away from me you freak! Get the hell out of here before I punch your soul out of your body!"

The swordsman got up and left quickly holding his nose. Verica calmed herself and then heard a small laugh. She turned to see a man looking at her. He was strangely dressed. He had pale blue eyes and black hairs. He looked really handsome and Verica blushed a little. But…was he laughing at her?

"And what are you laughing at?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to insult you." he said "I just find the whole situation quite funny. A swordsman getting punched by an acolyte, I'm sorry, but I don't get to see this everyday. Have a nice day young girl" Then he walked away.

Verica looked at him for a moment. 'What was that supposed to mean. What a strange man…' she thought.

The young girl resumed her walk toward the church. When she arrived, there were many people gathered by the front door. She joined the crowd to see what the fuss was about. In the middle of the crowd, she saw Vorast Trifden, one of the most important Arch Bishop of the Catholic Church and the closest counsellor of the Pope himself. What a sight really! Arch Bishops almost never leave the pope's side to mix with people like this.

"Hi there Verica!"

"Oh hi Ami. What is an Arch Bishop doing here?"

"Well, I can't say for sure, but he's probably here to attend High Priest Mazrim's Funeral" Ami said.

"Aah, right. It's really sad that he left us. I liked him a lot. But for the Pope's right-hand man to come here like this. I never realized high priest Mazrim was such an important person."

"I heard someone say that he invented Pneuma. Don't know if it's true though."

"Pffff, that’s nonsense!”

"Hey! I’m just telling you what I heard! Oh and priest Paico told me that you should cut your hair, they are getting long you know"

Verica looked at her shoulder-length hair. They were not that long of course, but it was a standard for young acolyte to keep their hair short. The priests used to say that only street girls had long hair, whatever that means. Verica never really understood...

"Whatever, I'll just cut them when they force me to. I like my hair like that!"

"Eh, as you wish. I have to go now, see ya."

Verica went into the church and walked toward the front hotel. She saw a kneeled man by the front seats, praying. She passed by him, but she quickly turned back when she realized it was the man who had laughed at her earlier. The moment she looked at him, he opened his eyes and returned her gaze. He smiled at her and sat on the bench "We meet again. Must mean something, don't you think"

She sat beside him and took a closer look at him. He seemed to be in his late twenties. He was very muscular and had many scars on his body (she could see because the front of his shirt was open) 'Don't stare like this stupid…he will notice…there, the way he's smiling, he TOTALLY noticed! Now think…say something intelligent.' 

"I've never seen anyone dressed like you beforeé What are you exactly?" She asked. 

"Hm, maybe I just have very peculiar tastes in fashion ."

"…Maybe…" Verica replied as she narrowed her eyes on the man. 

"…You don't look convinced" The man said with a half smile. 

"Because I'm not. You look suspicious."

"Is that so? And what makes you think I'm not just a random citizen?"

"Well, for a normal citizen, you're quite beefy." He laughed at that. "And to be muscular like that, you ought to be a blacksmith or a swordsman, but you're not dressed like one."

"Not necessarily. Maybe I’m just a beefy citizen. With bad fashion style."

"You wear an old holy cross given to young acolyte when they pass their test, which means you're related to this church somehow, but you certainly don't look like an acolyte or a priest."

"Hm, you noticed the cross?" He said with a raised brow.

"I was not sure. Mine is grey, like all the others, but yours is black like it's been burned and it is quite damaged. However, I'm sure it's the same because of the ruby and the carving".

The man stayed silent and waited for her to continue her analysis. 

"And there are stains on your gloves. To me, it looks like badly washed blood, which is, in my opinion, very suspicious."

"And your conclusion?" He asked, looking at her with a very serious expression, as if she was about to reveal to him the secret of life. 

"Maybe you’re some kind of ex-priest who betrayed the order and made a pact with a demon to gain power and get revenge on the Catholic Church?” 

The man looked at her intensely. She felt that he was looking at her soul, like her body was not even there. She had said it as a joke, but for a moment, she feared that she was right…

But then he laughed "You have a lot of imagination. I hope you’re as clever as you are creative." He said, smiling widely. What a warm smile he had. "You want to know what I am, I'll tell you. However, you might want to keep this for yourself, as people like me are not usually welcome here."

This piqued Verica's curiosity even more. "Why is that?" she asked.

"Now now, one question at a time please" he said while laughing. "Actually, I'm a monk. A champion of faith."

"a monk?"

"Verica!" Kebbaku yelled behind her. "Come here, now!"

Verica looked at her teacher and then looked back at the man who was standing up. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to cause you any trouble" He said with a sad smile before leaving.

Verica got up and walked toward Kebbaku.

"Don't talk to this man Verica. He's not supposed to be here, stay away from him."

"He seemed nice. He was praying and-"

"Just stay away from him. He's dangerous, don't question me young girl!"

Verica looked at her with surprise written all over her face, but nodded. Kebbaku left and Verica spent the rest of the day thinking about this strange man. When she went to bed, she didn't sleep, too wrapped in her thoughts.

\---

Verica got up next morning, still thinking about this so called monk. There was only one thing to do. When she didn’t know about something, the best way to rectify that was to look in the library. Surely they had books on monks, whatever that is.

She arrived at the library and greeted the girl at the entrance. She asked her if they had books about monks, but the girl said that she didn't know. "If we have one" she said "it's probably in the religious section". So Verica went to the religious section and started searching. It was getting late and she found nothing yet. She was about to give up when a familiar voice spoke to her.

"You look upset"

She turned around to see the so called "monk" she just met yesterday. "I'm trying to find a book on something…but they don't seem to have one" she said.

"Hm, that's too bad. Are you sure you looked everywhere?"

"Yes, I know pretty well how to search in a library, thanks".

"Did you look under the floor"

"Of cou…what?"

He didn't repeat. Instead, he just crouched under a table and lifted one of the wooden planks. He put his hand in the hole and took a book out of it. He put the plank back in place and gave her the book called The way of the fist. 

"There, this should satisfy your curiosity. But be sure to put it back in place when you're done with it".

Verica looked at him in disbelief. "Hm…thanks…"

"You’re welcome" he said with his ever present smile, then left the room. 

'Wait a minute…' "hey, but how did you know I was here looking for this!" She yelled

There was no answer.

Verica left the library with the book and got back to the church. She went to her room where she began reading it. She stayed up all night, wrapped in this new information she was getting. She had never heard of monks, but from what this book was saying, only acolyte could become monks. How come nobody ever told her she could follow this path instead of becoming a priestess? This way of life seemed so much more exciting. She recognized herself in their ways, fighting God's enemy with their bare hands and training their body and soul so that they can be in perfect harmony. She fell asleep on the book, and she dreamt of it.

\---

The next day, after her ever lasting lesson with Kebbaku, she went to the library and put the book back where it belonged. She came back to the church and looked everywhere to see if she could talk to the monk again, despite her teacher's warning. If this man was really a monk, then he was in no way dangerous for her. They were both servants of God. What's dangerous about it?

She looked everywhere in the church but didn't see him, so she tried looking outside. She arrived in the garden and she saw him hidden behind a tree. He was sitting and his eyes were closed. He was probably meditating or something like that…she remembered reading about it in the book last night. She didn't want to disturb him so she turned away to leave, but apparently he already knew she was there. "Hello again young girl. Was the book interesting?"

Verica sat in front of him and he opened his eyes. "Yes, I learned a lot. Thank you."

"You're welcome" he said. He was still smiling. It seemed to Verica that this man was just unable not to smile.

"Can I ask you a few questions, if you don't mind of course".

"Hm…I don't mind, but I believe your teacher won't be pleased to see you with me."

"What she doesn't know can't hurt her"

His smile widened. "hey, fine by me. What do you want to know?"

"well…for a start, could you tell me your name?"

"Sure, my name's Kenneth. And you are?"

"I'm Verica."

"Nice to meet you Verica"

That smile of him was hypnotizing…what did she wanted to ask him again?

"Was that all you wanted to know?"

"o-of course not! You said you were not welcome here; why is that?"

"Hm…" he looked at the sky for a moment, as if he really needed to think this question through before answering. "You see, monks and priests don't really like each others. Monks regard priests as weaklings who hide behind other people's strength and priests see monks as brute who are more dedicated to their personal growth and strength than to God. We are very few because information about us are kept secret. They don't want their young acolytes to follow our path. That's why they don't like seeing me here."

"That's totally stupid. We serve the same God…"

"I agree with you, but things are what they are."

"If you're not welcome here, then why are you here?"

"High priest Mazrim was my teacher when I was a young acolyte. I have a lot of respect for him, that’s why I decided to come and that’s why they tolerate my presence here. It would be very impolite not to let me pay my respects one last time. Now I suggest you leave, before you get in trouble" he said with a smile again.

"If you didn't want me around, why did you give me that book?" She asked, clearly suspicious.

"I'm just warning you, that's all. As I said, I don't want to cause you any trouble."

"Trouble's my middle name!" she said and he laughed quietly. 

"Is that so?" then he closed his eyes again "Good, because I believe it's too late to avoid it now"

"what are you-" as she asked, she saw Kebbaku in the garden. Indeed, it was too late because she'd already spotted her. She looked angry…

"Verica, may I have a word with you?"

Verica looked at Kenneth. He just smiled and didn't say anything while keeping his eyes closed. She got up and joined Kebbaku who led her into the church.

"Will you ever listen to me?"

"I'm sorry m'am"

"I told you not to talk to him, but you never listen! You always think you know better than your elders and you pick fight with other people! Your impudent personality and lack of respect for rules will cause your downfall! Don’t waste your talent like that! Now go to your room young girl. Stay there and pray. Pray and think of your insolent behaviour!"

Verica didn't say a thing, for if she talked, her voice would have betrayed her anger. She started to walk away  
.  
"And cut your hair while you're at it! There are getting long, I don't want you to look like a whore on your test!" Kebbaku yelled behind her. Verica didn't answer and started to run toward her room.

She cried in her bed until it was dark outside. She didn't understand why. It was so childish, but she couldn't stop herself. Kebbaku had never been so mean to her, but she was probably right. This was not the behaviour of a priestess. 

When she calmed herself, she left her room and went to the garden, regardless of her teacher's order. Once there, she crouched by the pond with a knife and looked at her reflection in the water. She was about to cut her hair when someone startled her.

"What are you doing with a knife?"

It was Kenneth. He looked worried. Understandable. Seeing a girl with a knife near her face probably looks suspicious.

"I'm cutting my hair" she answered.

"Oh…I see" he said as he took a good look at her. He looked directly into her eyes, but his gaze was too intense and she looked away. "Hum, are you sure about this? I mean, it's a pity really. I think long hair would suit you. But what do I know? I'm just a man…with bad fashion tastes, probably better not to listen to me eh?"

She laughed at that, and he smiled even more. He walked away without adding anything. Verica stayed by the pond for a moment, looking at herself. Then she returned to her room, without cutting her hair.

\---

That night, she slept well for the first time since her encounter with Kenneth, but didn't wake up feeling rested at all. 'It's probably the stress of tomorrow's test' she thought.

She got up and prepared for the funeral of High Priest Mazrim. Once there she took her place and waited. She looked for Kenneth and eventually she spotted him at the back of the church. She caught herself looking at him more than she should have during the ceremony, but she didn't want lo lose sight of him. Once it was over, she quickly made her way toward him before he left.

"Kenneth!"

"Hello there, young one. What can an old man like me do for you today?"

"I just wanted to thank you…for last night. You really cheered me up and I'm thankful for that."

"It was nothing, you're welcome" he said. "I wish you good luck in you apprenticeship Verica. It was a pleasure to meet you."

"You sound like I'll never see you again…"

"Well, I'm going back to St-Capitolina Abbey in a few hours so…maybe we'll meet again, who knows?"

"oh…right” She said reluctantly.

“Yeah.”

They stayed in front of each other for a moment. Verica was looking at the ground, like she was expecting him to say something. But he simply stayed there with his smile on his face and looked down at her, like the situation wasn’t awkward at all. 

“Hm…well, have a safe trip then!” Verica finally said. 

"Thank you Verica. Take care of yourself" He said with a caring smile and then left.

Verica stayed where she was for a moment. She didn't know why, but she felt sad. She considered her feelings. Deep inside she didn't want him to leave. She wanted to know more about monks. She went up to her room and thought thoroughly about the situation. Tomorrow was her passing exam to become priestess. But to be a monk…somehow she felt that it was the latest she really wanted. She looked at her hands and made up her mind. She wrote a farewell note to Kebbaku, took some of her belongings and left the church. She went toward the north gate, because St-Capitolina was north east from here, so Kenneth was most likely to go through there.

She arrived at the gate and she saw Kenneth waiting beside it. When he saw her, he didn't look surprised.  
"Hm? What are you doing here? Going somewhere?"

"Yes"

"Is that so?"

Verica bowed her head "Please take me as an apprentice" she said.

Kenneth looked at her, impassive. She could have said “Just passing by” and he would have had the same reaction probably. 

She didn't move. She stayed bowed. She would not move until he answered her.

“Hm…interesting. You studied all your life to become a priest. You want to throw this all away now, when your passing exam is tomorrow? Why is that?"

Verica straightened up and looked at him directly in the eyes for the first time. Only one thing could be seen in her eyes; determination.

"I was never given a choice to become a priest or not"

The monk stared down at her, obviously expecting more explanation than that. 

She looked at her hands and continued

"Those hands were meant to serve God, I'm sure of that. But they were not meant to heal people." She looked back at him "They were meant to slay God's enemies and protect the weak from evil! This is not my place. I belong somewhere else. I want to serve God in another way!"

Kenneth looked at her, unmoved. He wasn't sad or angry, but he wasn't smiling either. He looked so serious, and a bit scary. "Being a monk is not easy. It is neither a game nor a way to look cool. Only a few succeed, some die trying, some grow mad. It's not for everyone."

"I'll never know if it's for me if I don't try. I have faith in myself and I have faith in God. I know he will not let me down, because I fight for him."

Kenneth considered her for a moment, and then the warm and comforting smile was back on his face, along with an eye crease. "Good enough for me! Fine, follow me then!"

"But…wait! You're ready to leave? What were you waiting for before I arrived?"

"Well, I was waiting to see if you would come."

"…What?" she said with surprise.

"From the first time I saw you, I knew you had it in you." Kenneth simply said, putting his hands in his pocket. 

"Had what?" Verica asked with a raised brow. 

"The potential to become a monk. But I didn’t know if you would have the courage to give up your life as a priest. I’m glad I waited. Now stop looking at me like that, it makes me feel awkward. Let's get going". He said as he turned to leave Prontera.

Verica looked at his back. She was excited. So excited, but scared at the same time. Was she doing the right choice? Kenneth turned back toward her and smile. Another one of those warm smiles that made her feel like nothing can happen to her. That was all she needed to brush her doubt aside and step forward into her new life.


	2. The girl in my dream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter I refer to the “island region”. The island region is the eastern part of Rune Midgard map, on another continent. It’s made of the city of Gonryun, Amatsu, Louyang and Ayothaya, which all have a more “asian” look. That’s why I used words like “sensei” for teacher and “-san” and “-sama” at the end of names, which are titles of respect in Japanese. I decided to do so because when you go to st-capitolina abbey in the game, some npc have the title “sensei” at the end of their name.

‘WOW! They are sooo cute! I’ve never seen yoyos in real life before!!!’ Verica thought while looking around her. It was her first time outside Prontera and her surrounding was breath taking. All her attention was directed at the environment. 

“…You’re not listening to me are you?” Kenneth said with an awkward smile and a raised brow.

Verica quickly turned to him. “I…no, I’m sorry. This is my first time outside Prontera. It’s difficult for me to focus, I’m truly sorry”

“It’s ok. I understand. But next minute, I strongly recommend that you listen to me”

Verica straightened up and nodded, walking beside Kenneth. 

“Alright” he said with a smile. “So, as I was saying, before you can become a monk, you’ll need to pass a few tests.” 

‘Nice’ she thought ‘I traded a priest exam for a monk exam…’

“It’s not like your priest exam however”

‘What the? Is he reading my mind or… of course not, I’m so silly! Now focus!’ 

“You studied all your life to become a priest and the exam was supposed to test your understanding of what you were taught. You got that?”

She nodded. 

“But the tests you’ll pass in St-Capitolina are to test your personality. You can’t prepare for it by studying something. It’ll test your soul, your values. It will test you, as a person, to see if you are worthy of becoming a monk.” 

Verica gulped. This was…scary. She didn’t know what to think or how to prepare herself. 

“Do you understand?” Kenneth asked. 

“Yes, I understand, but I have some trouble imagining such a test. How is it?”

“I can’t tell you. But don’t worry. You just have to listen to your heart and have faith that God is guiding you. If you fail, it’s because you would not have been able to be a monk, so it’s just better like this. But if you pass, then you’ll be assigned a sensei and your training will begin.” He said with a smile

“A sensei?”

“That’s how people from the Island region call teachers. Many techniques were developed there, so we use some words from their language.”

“I see. So, my teacher will not necessarily be you?”

“That will be for the head master to decide. I’ve never taught before. I don’t know if she’ll let me.”

“The head master is like a chief?”

“You could say that. She’s the most accomplished champion of Midgard, or so they say”

“What is a champion?”

“Champions are monks who have reached the limits of their human minds and bodies. Through training, they attain perfect harmony and they can tap into the real strength of their being…”

Verica stared at the older man and blinked at few times. 

“…Let’s just say that they are like monks, but more powerful” He corrected with a smile “I’m a champion myself”. 

“I thought you were a monk!”

“A champion IS a monk, like a high priest IS a priest. It’s just the next step”

“So you’re like totally awesome and very powerful?! You hide it well” She said with a devilish smile. 

“Thank you, same goes for you and your feminity.” He answered, playing her game. 

“What…hmph” She looked away and crossed her arms, trying to look insulted, but it just made Kenneth laugh. God his laugh was contagious, just like his smile, so she laughed as well. 

‘I hope that he’ll be my teacher. I feel really comfortable with him. He’s so carefree. It’s like nothing really matters to him’ she thought. 

“And here we are” Kenneth said as he stopped. 

Verica looked up and saw the entrance of what seemed to be some kind of religious ruin. She followed Kenneth trough the gate. She saw a few people, just minding their own business, while some of them greeted Kenneth as they passed. Many seemed to come from the island region, like Kebbaku. 

“So you’re back boy. I’m glad. I was afraid the priest would kill you.” said an old man with a bottle of rum in is hand. 

“They could have tried” said Kenneth, and the old man laughed. He coughed loudly before walking toward Verica. 

“Really boy, I can understand you want to feel younger, but that’s no reason to take them THAT young you know…”

Verica looked at him offended. ‘What is THAT supposed to mean? You old geezer…’ she thought. As the old man laughed, Kenneth straightened and looked at him, upset. It was the first time that she saw him offended. Not that she’d known him for a long time either. 

“Yeah, I should just do like you and watch them when they bath.” He said. 

The old man stopped laughing and coughed loudly once again.

“Hm…seriously, who’s she?”

“What makes you think she’s not what you said, sensei? I’m your student after all. Wouldn’t be surprising for anyone here that I’m into that kind of stuff, hm?” Kenneth answered. He was still angry. She didn’t understand why. She’d teased him on the way here but he’d taken it lightly…maybe he was uncomfortable with sexual allusions. She understood that all too well. 

“You got lots of faults boy, but luxury’s not one of them. Fortunately, that’s one part of my lifestyle you didn’t follow. Now stop being such a smart-ass and spill it, who’s she?”

Verica was looking at both of them. The more they talked, the more she felt unimportant. They were talking like she was not even there, just like the priests used to do. 

“She’s an acolyte I met in Prontera. She wishes to become a monk so I brought her here.” Kenneth answered. His expression was softening a little. 

The old man was suddenly very serious and he looked at Verica. She felt very awkward. She didn’t know if she should talk.

“What’s your name?”

“..Verica sir”

“Haha, drop the sir girl, you won’t need it here!” he said while laughing “I can say by your manners that you were raised to become a priest, are you sure you want to change the path you’ll follow for the rest of your life? It’s very different…and difficult.”

Verica didn’t answer right away. This man was so intimidating. She glanced at Kenneth out of the corner of her eyes and he smiled at her. She smiled back and looked back at the old man. 

“Yes” 

“Fine then. I wish you good luck.” Then he just walked away and Kenneth resumed his own walk. 

“Who was that?” asked Verica. 

“My old sensei, when I was still a monk. His name is Mathias. He can be really…how should I say… unorthodox. But he’s a kind man. Let’s just say that he likes women too much” Kenneth said as he rolled his eyes. 

Verica looked away shyly. She was uncomfortable with this subject, being a priest-to-be for so many years.

“So…that means that, well...” she whispered. 

“Hm?”

“It means that monks are…I mean, priests are not allowed to have, you know, relations…”

“We are not priests. Remember, monks don’t like priests.” Kenneth answered before she finished. “Nothing forbids us to get married or to have sexual relations, if that’s what you mean” She blushed, like she’d never blushed before. “But still, the later is looked down upon. Everything that can get in the way of finding inner peace should be avoided. But…well, we are only humans after all.”

Verica looked away and remained silent. 

“But you’re too young to think about such things.” he said as he looked down at her with a smile. 

She looked up and frowned “I’m 16...”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m saying. For an old man like me, being 16 is awfully young.”

“How old are you exactly?”

“I’m 27.”

“What? That’s not even close to being old! That perverted sensei of yours IS old, not you!”

“Haha, thank you” he said while laughing, again. It really impressed her how everyone here seemed to always laugh…not like at the church. 

They kept walking as they talked and teased each other. They came to a stop in front of the St-Capitolina Abbey where a woman blocked their way. “What’s that Kenneth?”

“She’s here to pass the test.” he answered

“Does Moohae knows about this?”

“Ah, well, you see-”

“I don’t care about your excuses Kenneth. Go see Moohae and come back after. Every potential apprentice must register to him first. You know that. ”

Kenneth sighed and walked away. Verica followed him to another building. It was some kind of hall of the dead. They entered and she saw another old man, obviously from the island region as well. He was praying.

“Welcome back Kenneth” He said as he got up. 

“Thank you, Moohae-san. I have someone here who would like to become a monk.”

“Is that so? I’m surprised that you’ve come to me first instead of just bringing her to the abbey to take the test” He said with an annoyed expression. 

“Of course not...” He said with an awkward smile. 

“Hm, right. I suppose that this is she?”

The man looked at Verica, just like Kenneth did in the church; like her body was not there and only her soul could be seen. 

“What is your name young girl?”

“I’m Verica.”

The man took a book from his pocket and wrote something in it. 

“Go to the cemetery Verica and talk to a woman called Tooha. She will get you through your tests.”

“Y-yes...” she said as she turned to leave. Kenneth took a step to follow her but Moohae stopped him.

“You stay here Kenneth. I’m sure she can find her way alone.” 

Kenneth narrowed his eyes on the older man a second, then he turned back to Verica and smiled at her “The cemetery is north from here. Don’t worry, you’ll be fine”. 

She nodded and left the hall. 

Kenneth looked at Moohae with questioning eyes. 

“She really wants to become a monk, Kenneth? Or is it just you who pushed the idea into her head in order to bring her here and-”

“Moohae-san” Kenneth interrupted him “I’ll be honest with you, I’m sick of your prejudices. Yes, I was once Mathias’ student. Yes, he has…some doubtful values, but I’m NOT Mathias! Please stop doing everything to get on my nerves.”

“Is this a threat Kenneth?”

“Of course not”. 

“That’s too bad. It would have given me a reason to get you out of this abbey…”

The two men looked at each other for a long moment, in silence. Kenneth was about to speak, but a woman entered the room so he changed his mind on what to say.

“I’ll be going now if you don’t mind, Moohae-sama. I hope to see you soon again” Kenneth said with a smile. A very fake smile. 

“I look forward to it Kenneth-san, and good luck to your protégé.” Moohae answered with the same fake smile. 

Kenneth left, fist clenched. Once he was outside, he walked around, taking deep breaths to calm his anger and to stop him from ripping Moohae’s heart out with his bare hands. This man had always hated him for one simple reason; he was Mathias’ student. Those two had always been in competition, but Mathias would always beat Moohae in the end. It frustrated him to no end, no matter how much he dedicated himself to God, he would always lose to Mathias, whose morals were more than doubtful. Always drinking and sleeping with woman he didn’t even know while Moohae was training and praying, giving his soul and body to God. It wasn’t fair of course and Kenneth understood that, but who ever said that life was fair? 

“One must have the strength to accept what can’t be changed, the courage to change what can be and the wisdom to know the difference.” That’s what the church had always told Kenneth back in his acolyte days. Obviously, Moohae didn’t have the strength to accept the fact that Mathias was simply a genius, or didn’t have the perseverance to push himself even further to surpass his rival. Either way, he clearly lacked wisdom, to spit his venom on him like this! 

Kenneth looked at the sky and took one last deep breath, evacuating his anger in his expiration. Hating Moohae would not help. It would be best to ignore him for the moment. It was getting late and Verica would probably only pass her test tomorrow. Since then he had to speak to the head master. 

\---

Verica arrived at the cemetery. There was only one person, so she concluded that it was Touha. She walked beside her, but the woman didn’t move from her crouched position.

“Excuse me? Are you Touha?” Verica asked. 

“Hm? Yes, it’s me” the woman said as she got up

“Hello m’am. My name is Verica. I’ve come here to become a monk and Moohae told me to come and see you.” 

The woman looked at her in surprise for a moment before speaking “Wow, I’m sorry. It’s just that new apprentices are so rare! How did you find this place?”

“A man named Kenneth brought me here”.

“Hm…Kenneth? He brought you here to become a monk? Well, that’s surprising. Guess you caught his eyes” she said with a smile. Verica blushed, not knowing how to react to such a statement. 

“Very well Verica, I can see that you’re an acolyte…could you make me a demonstration of what you know?”

“Yes m’am”

“You can call me Touha” she said with a serene smile. 

“…Ok”

Verica remembered her lessons with Kebbaku and showed Touha her skills. Blessing, healing, agility increase and decrease, cure, holy light, etc. Touha looked at her the whole time and then she asked her to stop.

“Alright. I can see that you’re quite advanced. You’ll be able to take the tests without further training.”

Verica looked at Touha with excitement written on her face. She was eager to pass those tests, and to know if Kenneth would be her teacher. 

“Now, I will tell you one of the monk’s prayers and you’ll have to remember it and repeat after me, ok?”

“Yes m’am. I mean, Touha”

“Alright” she closed her eyes and put her hands on Verica’s shoulders. “I commit myself to veritas and aequitas. I will follow my path to enlightenment and purity. I will protect my brothers with my life. Evil shall never be victorious while I breathe. In nomine Patris, et Filii et Spiritus Sancti. Now, your turn.” Then she removed her hands.

Verica looked at her in disbelief. There was no way she could remember all this right there on the spot. 

“I…I commit myself…to veritas and aequitas…” she started. Then she said the second sentence…and the third. She said it all, like she’d recited it all her life. ‘What the…how could this be? I said it all, just like that. It’s impossible!’ Verica thought. 

“Well done. You have potential…huge potential; I can feel it flowing through you. God is guiding you, but of course, that’s not enough to become a monk. It’s getting late. I’ll show you a room where you can rest for the night. Tomorrow morning, go find Bashu at the Abbey and he’ll make you pass the tests.”

Verica didn’t understand. What just happened? It was like her body was possessed by someone else’s soul…

“Are you ok young girl?”

“Yes, I just…I don’t understand how I did this. I feel…strange.”

“It’s normal, you’ve awaken and your body is feeling its soul for the first time. It’s only the beginning.”

Verica looked at Touha for a moment, but concentrated on her own body. Indeed, she could feel her body and her soul, like two distinct beings. It was like she was aware of her own existence for the first time. Was that…her heartbeat she was hearing?

“Did you understand about tomorrow?” Touha asked. 

“Y-yes. Tomorrow morning at the abbey, see Bashu to pass the tests.” 

“Alright, let’s find you a place to sleep” Touha said while walking away. Verica followed her, trying to understand what was happening. 

\---

Kenneth went to the Abbey and walked in, greeting the girl at the entrance once again. 

“Moohae wasn’t too disagreeable?” Asked the girl. 

“An angel” he answered as the girl laughed quietly. 

Kenneth made his way through the Abbey until he arrived at the head master’s quarter. He knocked on the door and waited for an answer. A “yes” coming from the other side told him he could get in. 

Behind the door was a huge desk and behind that desk was a woman with a few brown hairs among her gray ones. Her face was serious, but not mean. It was the image of a strict mother. She had deep wrinkles around her mouth and eyes, evidence of a life time of laughter, and she wore them with an unexpected pride. She looked up from the papers she was reading and smiled when she saw Kenneth. 

“Welcome back Kenneth. You didn’t have too much trouble with the priests I hope?”

“No Master. Everything went well”

“Good, but surely you didn’t come here just to tell me that everything went well, isn’t it?”

“Actually, I wanted to tell you that I brought a potential apprentice from Prontera”.

“You? An apprentice? Is this some kind of joke?”

“I’m serious Master”

The woman looked at the man in front of her for a moment, her expression giving no hints on what she was thinking. Neither of them moved for several minutes. She just looked at him with an intense look and an emotionless face. He tried to keep visual contact with the woman, but eventually he spoke, just to cut the tension that was building. This woman could be so intimidating…

“I dreamt of her” he said. 

The old woman sighed and laughed a little “Kenneth, please, spare me those kind of details-”

“No, I mean I dreamt of her before I met her” Kenneth rectified. 

The head master’s expression became serious. “…What?”

“Before I left for Prontera, I had the same dream for a few nights. I’m in Morroc desert. I’m on the ground and I can’t feel my body, like I’m on the verge of death. She is kneeling beside me. She is older though, but I’m sure it’s her. There are other people around us with monk and champion suits, but they have no faces.”

“And what is she doing?”

“…She’s eating my heart.”

The woman looked at him in confusion. “…This is not funny Kenneth.”

“I’m not making fun of you, Yolene-sama. When she’s done she gets up, walk away and all the other people follow her. Then my eyes close and when I open them again, I’m inside that woman. I mean, I can see what she sees. It’s completely dark around me. She is fighting demons and every steps she takes brings some light to the surroundings. Then she arrives in front of a wall. She breaks it with her fist and a big flash of light blinds me…and then I wake up. I assure you, the woman in my dream really IS the girl I brought! I have absolutely no doubt about it!”

“Well, this is…disturbing. I don’t know what to make of this. It must mean something since you dreamt of her before you left but…Are you sure you’ve never met her before?”

“I’m sure. I was shocked when I saw her in Prontera and I recognized her right away. The fact that she was an acolyte…I took it as a sign.”

The woman looked at him with a very serious expression. She was thinking, Kenneth could tell by the way she frowned. 

“Well, either way, if she passes the tests, we will welcome her in our ranks. Now about your dream…really, I don’t know. I’m sorry Kenneth.”

“The thing is…master, I have a request”. Kenneth sais hesitantly. 

“Hm?”

“If she passes, she’ll need a sensei and-”

“If you’re worry about Moohae’s influence I-”

“…No, please let me finish master! I can’t let her go with someone else! I dreamt of her! It MUST mean something! I’m sure that our fates are connected somehow. You know I’ve never wanted to take the title of sensei, but this girl is different.”

“…What do you mean different?”

“I don’t know. I just…have a strange feeling about her”

“What? You’re in love with her” the woman teased. 

“With all my respect Master, I know how it feels to be in love and it has nothing to do with it” Kenneth quickly answered, trying to hide his annoyance. 

“I’m just teasing you Kenneth, don’t be such a tight-ass. I understand that you want to see through the situation. It sure is disturbing. But to let you teach her… I don’t know. You refused the last student I sent your way a few months ago Kenneth! You know that the council decides who will teach the new apprentices. You’re not supposed to refuse this title, but you did, and I let you get away with it. And now you want to teach her? Why should I make an exception for you and let you decide who your student will be? Anyway, I’m not sure it’s a good idea to make her your student particularly.”

“But I brought her here. I know it doesn’t give me the right to claim her as my student but-”

“You miss the point Kenneth” she interrupted “What’s bugging me is to know if you’re doing this just to solve the mystery of your dream, or really to teach her how to be a monk. Is it for your own interests, or hers?”

Kenneth looked at her with surprise, then looked at the floor.

“I believe even you don’t really know the answer to this question…”

Kenneth didn’t answer. 

“Go get some rest Kenneth. You have made your request, I will think about it. I can’t promise you anything”. 

“…I understand. Thank you Master” Kenneth said as he looked up. He bowed and turned around to leave her quarters. 

Once he was outside, he walked to the cliff to the south. He sat at the edge and looked at the sunset. The head master was right, he’d been selfish. He was so obsessed with his dream that he hadn’t thought about the girl’s well being. Maybe it had been a mistake to bring her here. If he was lucky, she would fail the tests and go home…and he would just forget about his dream. But she looked so determined to become a monk and he could feel so much potential from her. Damn this whole situation was troublesome. He fell on his back, his legs hanging in mid-air at the edge of the cliff. He looked at the sky and he fell asleep on the ground, wrapped in his thoughts.


	3. The Trial

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The tests are really based on the tests you pass in the game :B Characters as well.

Verica woke up the next morning in her new bed. Touha had brought her to what they called the sanctuary. There were beds everywhere in a large room where everybody slept and some kind of cafeteria in the other room where the main entrance was. Verica hadn’t slept much. She felt like a stranger to her own body. She didn’t know what Touha had done to her but it was maddening. The sound of her heart beating kept her awake almost all night and she could still feel it even now. She went to the other room and the man at the food counter gave her something to eat with a smile, without question, like she’d always been there. After she ate, she left and went to the Abbey to pass her tests.

She arrived there and the girl at the entrance stopped her.

“You’re the girl Kenneth brought? You came to pass the tests?” she said

“Yes”

“I can feel that you’ve already performed the prayer so you can go in. Bashu should be right there when you get in”. 

“Thank you.” Verica replied as the girl smiled and nodded. 

Verica entered the abbey and immediately she was accosted by a man.

“You must be Verica?”

“Yes. Are you Bashu?”

“That’s me! So, wanna pass the tests eh?”

“Yes!” she answered with enthusiasm. 

“Good, I don’t like to waste time. Your first test will be to pick mushrooms.” 

“…What?”

“You heard me well, mushroom picking.”

Bashu walked pass her to leave the abbey. Verica snapped out of her surprise to follow him. ‘is this some kind of joke?’ she thought. Bashu led her to a garden and gave her a basket. 

“Here, start picking mushrooms and come back to me when you think you got enough of them.”

“What’s the point? I mean, what are you testing with this?”

“Your patience, mainly”

Verica looked at him for a moment. ‘hm, don’t have much choice…’ She thought. She turned around and ventured into the garden. She spotted her first mushroom so she crouched, took it and put it in her basket. She repeated the same action all afternoon. Her basket was half-full and she was getting really hungry, so she went back to Bashu and showed him her basket. 

“Hm, nope. Sorry, you don’t have enough.”

“Can I take a break to eat then?”

“If you leave, you’ll have to start again.”

“What?!”

“Those are the rules. Do you want to quit?”

“…Of course not!”

“That’s what I like to hear.” he said with a smile. 

Verica walked away. ‘are those really the rules or is he just trying to kill me?’ she thought. She was so hungry, but she didn’t want to start again. She continued to pick mushrooms, filling her basket. Then suddenly she stopped, mushroom in her hand. Those were probably comestible isn’t it? She smelled it. ‘Doesn’t smell anything weird, but if I ate them it will take even more time to fill my basket. What should I do?’ Verica thought. She hesitated, but her belly decided that eating was more important than anything else at the moment. So, all her next mushrooms went into her mouth instead of the basket. When she wasn’t hungry anymore, she resumed her mission. 

\---

“This is no place to sleep you know”

Kenneth slowly opened his eyes. A blond-haired girl was above him, looking at him with her brown eyes, fist on her hips. 

“Good morning to you too, Carly.” He said as he sat up. His back hurted…as did his neck and his head. He rubbed the back of his neck as he whined. 

“That’s what you get for sleeping on the ground, stupid!” The girl said while laughing and sitting beside him. “I heard you brought a girl from Prontera, who’s she?”

“A girl who wanted to become a monk, so she followed me here.”

“Really? She probably followed you just because of your stupidly charming smile!” She said with a grin. 

“Don’t forget my pretty eyes and my smashing personality” he answered with the same grin. 

“pfff, please stop, I’ll die of laughter”. She said as she crossed her arms and looked away, quite like Verica had done on the way here…

“Hm, what time is it?” He asked.

“It’s past lunchtime” she answered. 

“…Shit.” He said as he got up.

“What is it?”

“I wanted to go see her before she takes her tests, but it’s probably too late now. I’ll try to find her anyway.”

“Who?”

“The girl from Prontera.”

“Oh, right. Sorry. Hm, does she have purple hair and dark eyes?” she asked. 

“…Yeah.”

“Ah, I thought so. I saw her in the garden picking up mushrooms, she’s probably still there.” She said. 

“Ah, the mushroom picking test…brings back memories. Anyway, thank you.” then he left and went to the garden. 

He found her, but he kept his distance. He watched her for a moment. He could tell that she was different, so it meant that she’d recited the prayer successfully. No surprise. This girl had something special about her. She was meant to be a monk and he had no doubt that she would succeed in all of the tests. 

“You brought us some good stuff from Prontera Kenneth.” Bashu said behind him. 

“Yeah, well, let’s wait until she passes all the tests though.” Kenneth answered with a smile. 

“I’m sure she will pass. I don’t usually believe in fate but this girl…she just has a big aura around her that says ‘I’ll accomplish great things in the future and you’d better be prepared for it’. Hm, no wonder she caught your eyes. Still, I’m surprised. I thought you didn’t want to be a sensei?”

“I won’t necessarily be her sensei. The head master will decide.”

“But if she asks you to take her, will you? Or will you just leave the Abbey for a months like the last time she tried to give you a student?”

“It was a coincidence. I had something important to do…”

“Yeah…right...”

“As you said, this girl is different. If Yolene wants me to be her sensei, I will. How could I refuse? The girl will probably prefer me anyway since she already knows me a bit.”

“She thinks she knows you, you mean. Be careful if you become her sensei; young girls are easily impressed. And don’t get me started on their emotions…”

“You think too much Bashu. I know all this, don’t worry. It is part of the training of a monk to control one’s emotion.”

“Alright. It’s just that…I feel so much potential from her. I don’t want it to be wasted by your inexperience...no offence.”

“…Well, whatever happens, I know the head master will make the right decision” Kenneth said, ignoring Bashu’s comment and trying to keep his smile in place. 

“yeah, of course”

“I’ll be going. Let me know how the rest of her tests went”

“Sure, don’t worry, your girl is in good hand” he said with a grin.

“Don’t grin like that. Seriously, it’s unsettling.” Kenneth said as he laughed

He left the garden and went to the sanctuary to eat. On his way, he met Mathias again. 

“Where’s your Prontera girl?”

“Passing the mushroom test.”

“And where are you going?”

“To the sanctuary to eat”

“Ha, well, mind if I join you?

“…no.”

They walked beside each other to the sanctuary. Kenneth was no fool. He knew what this was about. But he would wait for Mathias to speak. 

They arrived at the sanctuary and sat at a table with their food. They ate in silence. Kenneth waited, waited and waited. But eventually he just lost his patience. 

“For God’s sake Mathias spill it! What the hell do you want?!” Kenneth asked with annoyance. 

“What? Can’t I enjoy a meal with my ex-student?”

“I’m not stupid, old man. You never do this. So what do you want?”

“Hm, it’s just that you look troubled.”

Kenneth froze for a moment. Leave it to the old man to read him like an open book.

“Is that so? I guess I’m just tired from the trip to Prontera” He lied. 

“I’m just worried about you boy. If you don’t want to talk, that’s fine. I just wanted to let you know that I was there for you. You know you’re like a son to me…”

“…Are you drunk again?” Kenneth asked with a sigh. 

“No..”

There was a long pause. 

“…Maybe a little.” Mathias said with a smile as he scratched his head and looked up like he was trying to remember something. “It’s hard for me to tell.”

“You shouldn’t drink so much sensei…”

“I’m too old to stop now boy.”

They sat in silence for a moment. Kenneth looked at the old man in front of him. He never talked about personal matter like he had just done, unless he was inebriated. It was a shame really. The man had always drank, from as far as he could remember, but 5 years ago his consummation had become worrisome. He didn’t know why. Kenneth found it really sad and inappropriate, but who was he to tell this old man what to do? Anyway, if he wanted to talk, then he would talk.

“You remember the dream I mentioned to you?” Kenneth started. 

“Hm, the woman eating your heart? Yes”

“It’s her”

“Who?” Mathias asked, chewing on a piece of bread. 

“The girl from Prontera”

Mathias looked at him in disbelief for a moment and then he just started laughing, almost choking of the food in hiw mouth. 

“Haha! Who’s drinking now boy? Eh?! Seriously!”

“I’m serious, stupid old man!”

“That’s impossible boy, you think you’re an oracle or something!”

“I didn’t say that! But this woman in my dream IS the girl! I recognized her right away, even if she’s younger! Did you feel her potential?! This must mean something!”

“…So that’s why you brought her here.”

“She decided to come of her own free will.” Kenneth said, taking a bite of his meal. 

“Yeah, well, you certainly helped a bit! Anyway, if what you say is true…well, it sure is strange. Have you talked to Yolene about it?”

“Yes, but she doesn’t know what to make of it.”

“If your dream has anything to do with reality, I would say it was a bad idea to bring her here.”

“...Why?” Kenneth asked, not understanding why he was saying this. 

“Are you dumb boy? This girl might eat your heart in the future! If I were you, I would stay away from her!”

“She can’t really eat my heart! Maybe the heart thing is just…you know, symbolic.”

“Even if it is, I’m not sure it has a very positive meaning. Do as you wish boy. Just try not to let it distract you. Will you be her sensei? I suppose not.” Mathias asked as he took a sip of water. But from the smell, Kenneth could tell it was not simple water. Smelled more like vodka to him.

“If the head master tells me to, I will.”

“Really? I thought you didn’t want to be a sensei?”

“Well, I could make an exception for her. I can feel something special about her.”

“What? You’re in love with her?” 

Kenneth sighed and slammed his fist on the table. Coming from the head-master; ok, he could keep his calm. From this old fool; it was too much “Damn it! She’s just a child, you dirty old man!”

“It doesn’t answer the question.”

“NO! And I shouldn’t have to answer such a stupid question!”

“Ha ha, I’m just making fun of you boy, calm down. You can be such a tight-ass sometimes. But what is it then?”

“I don’t know. I think our fates are connected somehow.” He said as he calmed down.

“You believe in fate now? Was I really your sensei once? Haven’t I taught you anything.”

“You don’t believe in anything old fool! I often wonder if you even believe in God!” Kenneth said as he got up and left, leaving his half eaten meal behind. 

“Don’t do anything stupid boy!!!” Mathias yelled behind him. “And if you do become her sensei, try to be a better one than I was!”

Kenneth didn’t answer and just left the sanctuary. “Try to be a better one than I was” he said? Yeah, well, that would not be hard to do. As much as Kenneth respected Mathias, he couldn’t say that he had been a very good teacher. Actually, yes, he was a good teacher, but nothing more. When he had problems, he never helped him. He never felt a special bond between them. Now that he was always drunk, it was like he was regretting it and he was trying to make up for it, telling him he’s like his son. It was probably true, and Kenneth was more than happy to consider Mathias as his father more than his biological one, whoever this man was. But it was a little bit late to say it. He would have needed to hear this back when he was a young boy in dire need of a father figure, more than now. 

That’s why he had never wanted to become a sensei. He was too afraid of doing the same mistakes and end up like Mathias; old, drunk and full of regrets. But the situation was different now. He really wanted to teach this girl. He would not be the same as Mathias. He was not Mathias after all. It was clear to him that the girl would pass the tests. He couldn’t let her go with someone else. He had to make this right, for both his sake and hers. That is if Yolene let him teach.

Kenneth returned to the garden and watched Verica for the rest of the day, taking care of not being seen by her.

\---

Verica was still picking mushrooms, again and again. She went to Bashu three times, but she never had enough. The sun was going down and she was still picking mushrooms, like a robot with automatic movements. Then Bashu came to her, when the sun was totally out of sight. He took her basket and shook it a little. 

“hm, now you have enough. Good work.”

“That’s it? That was all?!”

“What? Maybe you want to continue?”

“O-of course not!”

“You did well girl. Many people just leave when they get too hungry. You made the right choice to eat the mushroom, even if it made you waste some time. You’ve showed patience, perseverance and resourcefulness.”

Verica looked at him. ‘Well, I guess everything went better than expected’ she thought. 

“Now you must be tired? Go back to the sanctuary and come back tomorrow for your second test.”

“Can you tell me what it will be?”

“I can tell you that it will test your patience once again, but also your concentration and your endurance.”

‘How helpful…’ she thought. 

“Come on now, go rest. You deserve it.”

Verica got up and went back to the sanctuary, as Bashu turned toward Kenneth and gave him a thumb up. Kenneth smiled and left the garden as well.

Verica sat on one of the bed in the sanctuary and looked at the people around her. Even if it seemed that everyone was sleeping here, she hadn’t seen Kenneth in the morning and he wasn’t here now either. Maybe he was sleeping somewhere else. She lay down on the bed and closed her eyes. Immediately the sound of her heart came back. It had been there all day probably, but she had been able to forget it during her test. Now that there was nothing to concentrate on, the feeling was back. She stayed like this though and tried to sleep. 

\---

Verica arrived at the Abbey the next day, eager to see what her next test would be. It was so different from her priest training. She really didn’t know what to expect, but she knew one thing: this was her place. Everyone seemed so happy and serene. Life seemed easier here. She felt free. She felt like herself. Kenneth was probably the best thing that had ever happened to her. Even if he was not her teacher, she didn’t care. She really wanted to be a monk. 

…But being his student would still be nice.

She was getting used to hearing her heart and feeling her soul. It was getting natural…a little more natural at least. She just didn’t understand what the purpose of this was.

Bashu took her out of her reveries “Are you ready for your second test?”

“Yes!” she said with a big smile. 

“I like your attitude! Follow me then!” 

They ventured deeper into the abbey and went down a flight of stairs. They went down for what seemed like an eternity. Then they arrived in some sort of corridor. 

“Alright, here’s the deal: You have to follow this corridor. There will be obstacles and traps and stuff. You just avoid them and continue. The corridor goes in a complete circle so you’ll come back here and run through the same obstacles again and again.”

‘Again and again?’ she thought. 

“So it’s like some kind of race?”

“…You could say that. But you don’t have to run. You can walk as slowly as you want. There is only one rule: you can’t stop.”

“What do you mean?”

“You can walk very very slowly if you wish, but you can’t stop completely. I you do, then I’ll reset your time and you’ll have to start over again, like the mushroom test.”

“Oh…”

“Yeah, “oh”. So just don’t stop no matter what”. 

Verica gulped. She was not particularly in shape, but she should be ok if she walked. 

“You start whenever you want.” Bashu said. 

Verica looked ahead; she took a deep breath and started to walk at a normal pace. I would be best to do the first lap slowly to see the obstacles and accelerate when she would be used to the terrain. 

She arrived at the first corner and turned left. It was filled with water and there were pillars just above the water. The whole corridor was like that. She jumped on the first pillar, then the second, etc. She tried to keep a steady pace while she jumped. She reached the other side and turned left once again. This corridor was also flooded. There was a 2 inch-large plank to cross the water. But there were blocks of wood coming in and out of the walls on each side at different height. There were pumping like piston and Verica had to jump and crouch every second not to be pushed in the water. She crossed the corridor, quite proud of herself. She turned left again and faced her last challenge. Deep water everywhere again. There were metal bars between the walls. She reached for the first one and crossed the corridor like a monkey. She arrived to the other side and turned left again, to the corridor she’d started to. 

‘Well, it wasn’t that hard after all’ she thought. Bashu was not there anymore. He was probably watching her from somewhere else. She was really pumped! She had done well on her first lap and it motivated her. She ran and finished her second lap with ease. She continued like this for a while. At some point she lost count of her laps. The monkey bars were getting hard on her arms. She had no idea how much time she’d passed here, but she was getting tired. Her back hurt from crouching on the 2 inch plank too, but she continued to move forward. She was breathing heavily. She’d never made such a difficult exercise before. She felt like her heart was about to stop, her lungs burned, her legs hurt like hell and she tasted iron in her mouth. She was slowing down with every lap. Even the plain corridor was getting hard to cross. She didn’t know the time, but surely she should have felt hungry by now. Strangely she didn’t. Her whole body was hurting so much; her stomach was the least of her worries. She was not running anymore now. She was walking, slower and slower after every lap. 

She was spending more time on each pillar…more time on each metal bar. She was barely able to jump above the blocks. When she was in the plain corridor, she breathed so heavily and walked so slowly…she looked like a zombie. She had completely lost track of time. She had lost track of her own thoughts as well. All her brain could do was praying to God and asking him to help her. She didn’t know how she managed to keep on, but every time she thought she would give up, that her lungs would explode, that her heart would stop or that her legs would abandon her, she was able to find a little bit of strength buried deep inside her to continue. She felt like a mere bystander to her own body…like her soul had taken control of her body and it was all automatic. Still, her body was begging her to stop this torture, but her mind was inflexible. After a moment, her body stopped hurting. She couldn’t feel anything anymore, not even the ground under her feet. All she could feel was her heart pounding and resonating in her entire body…

\---

“Hey, Kenneth!” 

Kenneth turned around to see Bashu. “Hey. How’s she doing?”

“She’s still doing the test. I’m going to her now, wanna come with me?”

“Sure” Kenneth said with a smile. He was happy to be able to see her at last. 

They both walked to the abbey and to the test ground.

“Why did you asked me to come with you?” Kenneth asked.

“Well, since you monitored her all day on her mushroom test, I thought you would like to actually speak to her and tell her how proud of her you are haha” Bashu said with a laugh.

“…What is that suppose to mean?”

“It’s ok Kenneth. I don’t know why she’s so important to you and honestly, I don’t want to know. In any case, I take back what I said the other day: you would be a great sensei for her.”

“And why? I thought I didn’t have enough experience…” Kenneth asked, a bit suspicious. 

“Yeah, but as I said, you obviously care a lot about her! I know you won’t let anything bad happen to her and that you’ll take her apprenticeship very seriously. Beside, you’ll never gain experience if you never have a student. Yeah, I hope Yolene-sama will let you teach her” Bashu explained with a smile. 

“….Thank you.” Kenneth said, a little taken aback by what he just said. Bashu just smiled at him as they went down the stairway. 

\---

Verica finished the monkey bar and turned to the first corridor and saw Bashu, with Kenneth beside him. She walked to them until she was a few feet away from them, then Bashu told her to stop. Verica fell to her knee and immediately the pain came back. Her breath was shaky and heavy. The pain in her legs and arms came back as well as the iron taste in her mouth. She coughed loudly, her hand on her heart and her head bowed. She felt dizzy. She started to feel hungry as well. 

“Well done” Kenneth said with a smile filled with compassion. 

“What…what time is...is it?” She asked, her voice harsh as she looked up to them. 

“It’s lunchtime” he answered.

“What?!! That’s…that’s impossible!...I’ve been here…much longer than…than that!”

“Yeah, you started yesterday morning” Bashu said. 

“…What?”

“You’ve been here an entire day”

“…This is impossible!”

“That’s why it’s not everyone that can become a monk” Bashu said with a smile as he crouched to be at eye-level with her “When the body is solicited beyond a certain point, it enters some kind of trance and it can sustain an abnormal effort. It is very hard to reach this trance. Usually, people give up before that. That’s what the prayer is for. It awakens your body and your soul as two distinct being and gives them power. Even if your body can’t take it anymore, your mind tells it to continue anyway and your body can’t do anything but follow. That’s why it’s important for a monk to train his body, but to train his mind as well!”

Verica’s brain was like stew. She wasn’t getting a word of what he was saying…

“Now, one last question: you didn’t stop did you?” 

“O-of course not!”

“And why didn’t you stop?”

Verica looked at him in confusion “well…you said not…not to stop...”

“Yeah, but who told you that I was watching you?” he said “You could have stopped and I wouldn’t have known it.”

“...What?! But…I…what’s the point?!!”

“Even if you didn’t see him watching you, you assumed he was and followed his orders.” Kenneth explained “This is the same with God. We don’t have proof that he is monitoring us, but we must still follow his ways, no matter how hard it is. It takes a certain kind of spirit, a certain kind of personality to understand that and to accept it. You showed that you had the mind needed to be a monk, as well as the body.”

Verica looked at Kenneth and tried to understand, but her head hurt and her vision was blurry…

She passed out on the ground. Kenneth and Bashu looked at each other as they smiled. This brought back memory. Everyone pass out after this test, it’s such a huge effort. Eventually with training, monks can do this kind of exercise relatively easily. Kenneth bent down beside her and took her in her arm, bridal style.

“Only one test left” Bashu said “What do you think?”

“She will pass, there’s no doubt about it” Kenneth said as he went up the stairs. Bashu followed behind him. They left the Abbey and Kenneth brought her back to the sanctuary and put her on a bed to let her rest. Kenneth stayed in front of her for a moment and watched her. Carly arrived at the same moment and watched him. 

“Hm, your interest for her is...unsettling Kenneth. Are you…in love with her or something?” She said with a disappointed look. 

“FOR GOD’S SAKE!!!” Kenneth yelled as he turned toward Carly. There goes THE question again. Once? ok. Twice? Well…irritating, but ok. Thrice? Fuck this! Was it some sort of conspiracy? Had everybody decided to get on his nerve? “What’s wrong with all of you?! FUCK, she’s 11 years younger! I don’t even know her! Are you doing this on purpose to annoy me?!!” Everybody in the sanctuary turned toward them. Bashu and Carly took a step back, not used to see Kenneth lose his temper like this. Love had always been a delicate subject with him. None of them ever had the guts to ask why. 

“Ok, ok, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to insult you Kenneth!” Carly said. 

Kenneth sighed “It’s just that it’s the third time someone asks me that. I am NOT in love with her and I don’t feel anything improper toward her either! I just have a strange feeling, which is NOT love. It’s...complicated.”

“Alright alright…I just found it strange, that’s all”. 

He sighed again “…please just don’t ask questions.”

“it’s ok Kenneth, I believe you. It’s just…” her voice went down, barely above a whisper “…You know, I thought that maybe it was why you declined…” 

“We already talked about this Carly.” Kenneth said, whispering as well. “It had nothing to do with you. I just can’t. Not with you, not with her, not with anyone.”

Bashu decided it was his cue to leave, so he subtly made his way outside. Carly just looked at Kenneth with the same wounded expression she had the first time this conversation occurred. And it saddened Kenneth as much as it did back then...

“Carly, don’t make that face please. It’s not my intention to hurt you. I care about you, you know it. But-”

“Stop it Kenneth. You’re right. I shouldn’t have brought it back, I’m sorry…”

“Carly…”

“I hope you protégé will do well on her last test” she said with a brilliant smile “The last one is the hardest, but I’m sure she’ll do well!”

“…Y-yeah.”

“I’ll go for a walk now… see ya later!” she said as she left, smile still in place. 

Kenneth stayed where he was for a long moment. His attention went back to Verica, then he sighed and sat on the bed beside hers. Women…they were so much trouble.


End file.
